


Terrible at Ladies

by rummyjoe



Category: Hawkeye (Comics), The Avengers (2012), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-28
Updated: 2013-02-28
Packaged: 2017-12-03 21:06:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/702638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rummyjoe/pseuds/rummyjoe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Clint Barton is great at some things and not so great at others.</em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Terrible at Ladies

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Amy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amy/gifts).



"Hey," Kate said from behind Clint. "What are you doing?"

He almost jumped out of his chair.

_Okay, this looks bad._

"When did you get here?" he asked, pulling his hand away from where he'd been scratching (no, really) his balls through his boxers.

"Just now. You didn't hear me knock?"

At his shrug, she moved to stand next to him and glanced down at the table.

"What are you doing?" she asked again.

"Uh. Nothing." Clint dropped his pen and attempted to cover the paper in front of him. "Hey, give that back!"

She read aloud from the list she'd just stolen:

HAWKGUY'S SKILL SET:  
\- Barbecues!  
\- Great at boats!  
\- shooting stuff with arrows (good aim)  
-  
-

 

She pointed at the (very large) blank space on the paper. "You forgot Dog Whisperer."

"Yeah, well, I'm trying to put them in order, and that's gotta go lower on the list 'cause you take better care of him than I do." He shrugged again. "Simone, too. I just give him pizza sometimes."

"You don't give yourself enough credit, Hawkeye. Everyone adores you."

Clint snorted. "Tell that to my exes."

"AND," she continued, ignoring him, "you have a good heart." Kate ruffled his hair, then rested her hand on top of his head. "You bought this building to keep everyone from getting kicked out. You babysat Simone's kids when she had to work a double shift, and they can't get enough of you."

Her fingers started lightly running through his hair. It felt nice.

"Not to mention that you save the world every so often," she added in a dry voice.

"That's part of the shooting things part." He gestured toward the paper she held in her left hand, which he noticed was now lowered to her side.

"You took in a couple of strays," her grip on the paper loosened as she talked and played with his hair (It still felt really nice.), "and you take care of them and feed them and give them a place to sleep, and all you get in return is their lo--"

"Ha! Got it back!" Clint crowed as he jumped out of the chair. He held the paper away from Kate, who suddenly looked angry, though he had no idea why.

"Why do you want this?" he asked as she grabbed at the paper. "You already read it." He attempted to back through the doorway to the living room, but a second later he found himself flipped and lying on the floor.

He knew that move.

He pushed himself to his feet, slowly. "When did Natasha-- Hey!" Kate was bent over the table, pen in hand, writing on his paper. "What are you doing?"

She straightened and dropped (threw) the pen onto the table.

"Just adding something to your list," she said lightly, in that tone she used when she was really irritated and didn't want to show it. Clint thought of it as her Uptight Rich Girl Voice. She walked past him into the living room and grabbed her coat.

"Wait!" he called after her, confused. "Are you leaving? You just got here!"

His only answer was the door closing (slamming) behind her.

Clint looked at the door and rubbed at the back of his neck with his hand. Then he glanced down at his list. At the very bottom of the page, leaving a large amount of white space above it, he read in bold (angry) capital letters:

-  
-  
-  
\- LADIES

 

**Author's Note:**

> Amy comes up with a lot of hilarious ideas. Sometimes I run with them, and every once in a great while, I write them up & post them where other people can see.
> 
> I stole the title from Amy, too. (Seriously, you guys; she is great!)
> 
>  
> 
> originally uploaded wrong draft -updated 2/28. no substantive changes.


End file.
